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    November 19

    沉思...堕落...懊悔...

    为什么自己会变得如此的脆弱...不堪一击...为什么自己会变得如此颓废...一蹶不振...为什么自己会变成这样子...WHY..........
    时间过得很快...转眼间已经到了大学毕业.出外找工作了...自己总觉得好象昨天才刚走进这个校门...今天就要离开校园了...几年的大学生活好象没有留给自己太多的回忆...回忆里的画面只是一些平淡无味的生活点滴...或许自己心中向往的大学生活在这所学校里找不到吧...回想当初.自己认为大学一种遥不可攀.神圣的地方...一直是自己的梦想...最后自己放弃了所拥有的.重新参加高考.让自己踏进大学...满腔热情的学习态度...渐渐的自己失去了夕日那种向往大学读书生活的感觉...随之而来的是放纵自己...旷课.作弊.酗酒.嗑药.惹事...弄得自己成了什么样子...对于自己将来的路越来越迷糊...看不清了...自己恨自己变成这样子...自己很内疚...对不起有所期待的家人.更对不起自己的未来...当自己想要重新站起来的时候...却发现自己陷得太深了...力不从心...究竟自己的斗志去了哪里...自信去了哪里..."朱慧彬"简直就是个混蛋...
     

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    有时候自己很难面对自己的过去.总是那样的内疚.总那样的恐惧.
    Dec. 16
         似乎我好久没来了..
         "嗑药"是什么东东来的....
      年少轻狂,很多人都在这个时候把持不住自己.
        至少你知道自己的症结所在,别空口说大话,
        知道懊悔就要好好改正自己,
        做过的错事或许无法在再改变了,
       但你可以从现在起做一个全新的自己.
         努力才会成功的~~~
     
        
    Dec. 10

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